To my readers......

SITE UPDATE NOTICE

Thanks for visiting mitchmen, home of Mitchell's Gay Art

The Caps and Collars/ Flat Cap Gang story at Google Groups has now resumed. (see Group News for link)

Message updated 2nd Nov 2022

Friday, 28 December 2012

Jockspank Blog removed then re-instated

Wot, No Spanking Today?

Update January 30th 
Jockspank blog has now been re-instated
(link in sidebar)
 but I leave the original blog entry below, most of it is still valid

I was disappointed to discover this morning that the Jockspank blog has been removed by Google - reasons not specified of course. Fortunately they have a back-up blog at  JockSpank2 which continues to publish sexy spanking pix, so I shall not have to find another place for my bottom spanking fix!

The Jockspank team seem to think it is just a glitch related to automated spam detectors (see article at link above), so I shall leave my original link in the sidebar in place for now, in the hope that the powers-that-be relent and restore them to life - as they did with mitchmen blog a couple of years ago. 

It's a good time to remind mitchmen blog readers that if this blog (or any of my sites) ever disappears you will be able to find me again most easily by visiting my 'portal' at http://mitchmen.com or join my Yahoo! Group - which is the best way to see my pictures anyway.


Friday, 21 December 2012

Arrest No 6 - Etienne's Night Patrol

Etienne's 'Night Patrol' is possibly one of the best known 'Erotic Arrest' stories, a classic. Seeing the first picture in the series (below) was one of my earliest experiences of gay erotic art. The image of the handsome young man allowing two cops to undress him made a tremendous impact on me, helping to inspire my own art.

1

The Night Patrol catch an unfortunate youth with his pants down.

For me this is the best drawing in the series, Etienne captures the magic moment where the driver, faced with his misdemeanour being made public plus a fine he can't afford, freezes, which encourages the cops to suggest an alternative solution. Etienne has lovingly crafted an irresistible object of desire in this pretty young man with a wealth of sexy detail, from his floppy hair down to his sports shoes. The cops look a little bit comical, leaning in through the windows, but they seem powerful and mean - but certainly not ugly! Their maturity and authority are important ingredients in what follows.

Etienne did another story (Patrol Car 682) where the cops catch an amorous, straight couple in a steamed-up car and, with the girl running away, proceed to deal with the young man left behind. I believe this may be the underlying storyline here too, but it could equally be a choir boy caught speeding to church practice. 


 2

 The cops suggest payment in kind to the bewildered young man, 
pulling him out of the car to give head. 

In this picture Etienne emulates Tom of Finland in disguising an impossible arrangement of objects, in this case the car door, which in the real world would completely block the space between the cop and the young man. In Etienne's universe it magically retracts into the background to allow the action to proceed. It's a quirk that doesn't really matter, the point of the picture is the look on the face of the youth as he is offered the chance to taste cop dick.

The picture sequence in this series is not obvious, there are numerous continuity issues but I'm putting this one as no 2 based on the cop on the left who seems to still be holding the shirt he has just taken off. However, I can't explain why they have apparently switched cars!


 3

The second officer guides the young man's head into his colleague's crotch. The cop's thighs engulf his face - this is real deep throat. He's probably unaware that his legs are invitingly splayed open, a sign of things to come.

4

In pictures 4&5 both cops have climbed inside the car. They continue demonstrating the ways of justice in these parts. He is extremely receptive and aroused by their instruction. 

Note that he has mysteriously got both legs in his jeans now after starting out with only one. 

Pictures 2-4 are drawn in Etienne's, pen and ink, 'Stephen' style.
The detailing of the car interior here is suddenly very geometric and precise.

 5

In this curious picture the cop's raised fist and the young man's grip on his buttock seem to suggest that his course of instruction has moved or is about to move on to a rather advanced level. The cop pulls the young man in closer, creating a memorable pose that is both intimate and full of portent. The student looks to be tiring but certainly couldn't be said to be drooping - perhaps it's all down to the sight of the second cop unzipping in the back seat. 

For fellow geeks, note how the crossing legs create another 'impossible' conjunction of objects.


6

The young man is taken from the car and offered a double helping. His upper torso looks as tasty and inviting here as it did in the first picture. Golden showers might well be the order of the day shortly, but there is a good deal in this series which is left to the viewer's imagination. I find the youth's dick sprouting from a nest of pubes, but partly hidden, a very erotic device too, although the clumsy twist in the lower body has led some internet purists to crop it off entirely (along with the signature regrettably). 

This particular picture could appear almost anywhere in the closing sequence, the figures are shown a long way from the car (hence my water sports suggestion) but that doesn't really help to place the scene in sequence. At this point, the second moustachioed cop has removed his trousers (but see No 8 below).


 7

 The second cop takes his turn at close quarters while his pal moisturises his tool and uses the toe of his boot to prepare the point of entry. The rigid arching of the boy's body suggests he's thrilled by it all. The sudden appearance of the moon seems to imply the passage of considerable time, the night marching on as the fun continues. Atmospheric but I'd hesitate to suggest it's romantic.

Close inspection of the victim's impressive 'flagpole' shows an object like a penis-head between his balls, the belly area behind doesn't look right either. If any reader can throw light on this, I'd be interested to hear from them. 



8

The denouement is conducted over the bonnet of the police car. He's not exactly taking it in his stride.  but his wide-open legs suggest a willingness to engage. Not Etienne's best drawing, but you can see where he's going and it still works in its earthiness. This passive pose harks back to picture 3 in a satisfying symmetry (which was possibly not intentional). Etienne obviously liked it; he recycles it in other stories. 

The original sporty character seems to have transformed into a much older and mature man for this important moment. It's a slightly disappointing discontinuity. Both characters would make this story attractive but the older one pulls different strings, erotically speaking and would give it a different feel.


 I have placed this picture after no 7 where the cop appears to be 'lubing-up'. Rear penetration is usually the 'coup de grace' in a story such as this - but cop no 2 at the back looks fully dressed here so it's possible this image belongs earlier, say at no 6 where it would serve as an intermediate climax, prior to the concluding rites.


9

Before he met these two cops this might have seemed like the ultimate indignity. He's clearly turned on by it now. In fact, he's been aroused all the way through the action, enjoying 'the game'. As is usual in fetish scenes, once sex gets under way, dark hints give way to lustful desire - as in the Keith 'punk' story for example (see Arrest No 4). In this story it's only the final image that fully reveals the sub's enjoyment of the scene and his willingness to participate without any hint of ambiguity. The young man's upward tilted head is surely the epitome of submission. Astonishingly, handcuffs do not feature anywhere in this little Polce epic, another sign of the sub's willingness to follow the cop's authority and assertiveness.

Above, the cop celebrates a successful operation in the traditional manner by smoking a cigarette. His knowing smile and backward thrust give his dominance a flavour of casual smugness.  The young man has certainly earned the cancellation of his ticket! 

Night Patrol is something of a flawed masterpiece, the quality of drawing fluctuates between extremes, even within the same picture but there are elements in most of the pictures which are pure, erotic genius - even when they are imperfectly realised. There are continuity issues with clothing and positioning of the characters, but in a sense this is not a story, but a series of snapshots, impressions of events in a protracted process of initiation, an A-Z of gay sex almost. So, picture sequence is perhaps not crucial to our enjoyment.

It pleases me that the characters remain partially clothed throughout, it helps to retain their identity and enhances their sexiness - just look at picture 9! In addition, Etienne's facial characterisations are impressive, there are 3 distinct looks here and while you can imagine meeting these cops in your local dungeon, doing similar things, you know the young man would never be seen there. He doesn't seem to belong in such a place so it's a surprise to discover him enjoying this situation, which makes it all the more pleasant for us!

 The sense of control and domination throughout 'Night Patrol' makes it a uniquely daring take on the arrest theme.

More by Etienne

Sunday, 16 December 2012

Arrest No 5 - Loitering with Intent, with Peter Lovett


 The notorious cop, Rio Majeska, got up horny this morning.
As he dresses for work, he wonders what excitement today will bring.
He's assigned to toilet patrol today.


Today's victim turns out to be the rather delicious Peter Lovett, who's just returning home from dropping off the kids at school.  He's unbuttoned his jeans in the car to have a little fondle while he drives along and cruises the guys on the sidewalk. When he spots Rio hanging out at the toilets by the park, he is intrigued by the Cop's unusual garb so he stops and strikes up a conversation.


 Close proximity to Rio's uniform is soon making Peter itch for a bit of action. 
He tries some subtle signals to see if the cop is up for it.

  

"Are you propositioning me, punk?!!!" snarls Rio. 
Peter realises he's made a mistake. 
 "No officer! You've got it wrong! Please don't arrest me!" he squeals, 
he is terrified of his secret life being exposed. 


  "Tell you what Officer, why don't we pop back to my place for a coffee
and sort this out in a civilised fashion?"


Back at Peter's house, the cop is still pretty uncompromising.

"You think you can change my mind with instant coffee and cheap excuses?
You'd better make that mouth useful, punk.
Show me how sorry you really are. Before I run you in!"

Peter panics,"I'll do anything!" he gushes.
He tentatively samples the proffered dripping tip
but it looks as if it might be more than he can handle.

Unfortunately, the Cop is not satisfied that easily.  
"Your sucking's as lousy as your coffee", he complains,
"All you've done is get me all worked up, you stinking punk!"
"You'd better turn around! Now!"
  

"Hmmmmn............., 
I think a piece of your ass might just the place to finish off".

Peter gulps and braces himself, 
"OK, but please don't hurt me, Officer" he grizzles


Afterwards the cop does lays back on the bed.
"You've got a hot ass, punk, that wasn't too bad" he says dreamily.

 Peter strokes and fondles him in the afterglow.
"You've given me a lesson I won't forget. It was so painful"
he grovels massaging his glowing ass-hole.

The cop just laughs at him.
"I guess I could overlook your behaviour - just this once", he concedes.

 "Gee, that's really good of you Officer. I'm so grateful."

The Cop gives him a hard look,
"Sure, you make sure you remember that."


"Phew! What a reaming that was! I'll have a tender ring all week.
But at least it got me off the indecency charge.

Trust a cop to bugger off as soon as he's had what he wanted,
..... leaving me to finish myself off alone......

 ...... mmgggh.....mmgggh.....mmggggh.......

..........Cripes, that's the wife, back already
and I haven't changed the bedsheets yet!"

THE END

The plots of these stories don't vary much. It's odd that the fantasy of 'sleeping with the enemy' has such erotic power. The reality of Police entrapment was much nastier.

Peter Lovett's homely masculinity makes this series a little bit special. 

Storyline by Mitchell for mitchmen.
Photos Courtesy of  Colt Studio Group

Tuesday, 11 December 2012

Arrest No 4 - The Punk in Black and White


Keith produced his Punk Arrest series in watercolour or some similar medium and so my efforts at 'restoration' using pencils were always likely to be imperfect. The original colours have a comic-like brightness not completely ideal for raunchy subjects. It made me wonder what the images would look like in monotone so I produced some greyscale scans. The results (below) are not unpleasing.

I plan to republish the complete Punk Arrest series in greyscale like this at my mitchmen Yahoo! Group over the Christmas period (link in sidebar)


Thursday, 29 November 2012

Arrest No 4 - The Punk by Keith

 I have always liked this little series of pictures by the artist, Keith, for reasons which I explain below. Fragments of it have long circulated amongst internet art groups, usually as small, indistinct images. I've have always wanted to 'restore' them so that they are easier on the eye and was finally prompted to do so when I discovered a number of frames which were previously unknown to me and which filled in major elements of the story line. These images are the result.

1
The story concerns a 'punk' named Darryl. Darryl is one of Keith's stock characters. In the UK, 'punk' refers simply to those who follow rebellious, punk rock fashions, like the blue mohican Darryl is sporting here. In the US it has much wider 'bad boy' connotations, which I only dimly grasp, but I think the situation here is clear. The detailing of the bottle is nice, don't ask me what the orange liquid is! 

My 'restoration' work on these pictures is limited in the main to enlargement of the image and penciling over the figure outlines and dialogue boxes to make them sharper and clearer. This removes some of the original subtlety in a few places where Keith where used different colours to delineate a boundary instead of a hard outline (e.g. Darryl's pecs) but I have tried to use restraint and I think it does achieve better clarity. In this picture I also enhanced background colours a little where the boundaries seemed indistinct. The writing on the sign shows the 'faded' look I started with.

 
This picture shows the main reason why I like the series so much, the cop dressed in oh-so-short shorts which reveal muscular, hairy thighs. Indeed, Darryl's sighting of them seems to have prompted an instant orgasm. The circular badge on the cop's shorts (a sexy detail) appears to say MAD Patrol but I don't know what that refers to, apart from the obvious pun. I was tempted to remove the strangely canted house in the background but decided to respect the original intent.

3
There's a nice sense of struggle here, mainly provided by the cop. Readers will know from previous posts that I like the 'click-click' moment where the handcuffs give the cop control over the arrestee. The fact that Darryl is now nude, his yellow underwear/swimwear trampled underfoot, makes it all the more sexy. The punk's exaggerated feet will also delight enthusiasts of that fetish. The detailing of the toes, slightly baby-like, truly captures their essential appeal. Darryl's protest is suitably insulting (shorty) but the 'storm trooper' bit doesn't seem derogatory enough to me. I like the cop's reponse, it might sound punchier if 'crack' was substituted for 'ass' or is 'wax' a pun on 'whacks'?

  In picture 3, I fiddled with the shading on Darryl's six pack since the original detail was very faint.

4

Darryl is cuffed and made to grovel, while the arresting Officer examines his discarded swimsuit like a sniffer dog. One suspects that the baton casually angled towards Darryl's rear may also be involved in the cavity search. From this angle, the earlier threat to wax his ass appears to be not entirely without merit! A second Officer looks on, leaning casually on the police car at a somewhat improbable angle, but he looks very handsome in his sun-glasses and slightly menacing. It's a nice study. There's almost two pictures in one here with a slight discontinuity in perspectives between foreground and background (there's a similar effect in picture 2)

 I think this must be the quintessential 'short shorts' picture. We get a splendid rear view showing buns tightly cupped and divided by the centre seam and in the background, a front view with lump, highlighted by creasing lines and the fly seam diving into the groin. The turn ups on the legs are a great touch emphasising the cop's meaty thighs.


5
 
Back at the station the inevitable occurs as Officer 'Rocky' delivers his ultimatum and, anticipating a positive response, begins to shrug off his shirt. Officer Jones produces his own baton. This is a centrepiece drawing of the set but is not entirely successful, Darryl's starting to look a little musclebound and Rocky's strip act isn't quite right, but I like the way the underside of his thighs catch on the edge of the desk.

I really struggled with clarifying this picture, the original was very faded and blurry and Keith, the artist, relied a lot on just colours to create boundaries and shading. My addition of hard lines looks heavy handed in places but I say in my defence that the bright orange and brown background colours on the scan I'm working from needed to be contained and pushed back. I added quite a lot of over-shading on the bodies to show the musculature and restored some hair on Rocky's body which was very faint. Apologies to the artist!

The truncated series that circulates amongst fetish art groups normally ends here. The pictures which follow were provided to me by fellow collectors after I appealed for more information about 'Keith' and this set. These images have less fetish content, uniforms are shed and sex rears it's head, but they are not entirely devoid of fetish interest.  

 6

 Jones' elegant figure and the shorts pushed down round his thighs are highlights of this picture as the sexual scene gets going. Despite all the waving of batons by the Officers, they seem to refrain from striking their victim.

 Happily, the participants seem to have regained their original appearance in this picture, continuity is something of a burden for hand artists, but faces are crucial for identification, particularly when there are no clothes to help out.

In this group of images I did little more than enlarge and pick out outlines. The square screen which cuts across Officer Jones' six pack is a distortion caused by the original scan and would probably be better removed altogether but that was further than I wanted to go in this exercise. 


 7

Darryl's humiliation continues, but he is obviously not the first to fall victim to Rocky and Jones. The pixilation of Rocky's body hair completely defeated me here, this could only be remedied by a major alteration -  erasure and re-drawing.

8

Officer Jones gets another nice treatment by the artist here, he shows a handsome foot. Darryl's stretched mouthful is well captured too. There are more pixilation problems for Rocky (face and body hair). He has become noticeably the less dominant of the two cops in this sequence. 

 9
 Two more cops spot what Jones and Rocky are up to and eagerly start undressing in the corridor outside. We get a final glimpse of the cop's uniforms and move into gang bang territory. The original air of vindictive menace has now, sadly, almost entirely disappeared. Nevertheless Darryl's ass, dripping with cum is a sexy highlight - plus more cute feet. This is another of Keith's 'split' images with some curious exaggerated perspectives.
 10
 A moment of pure slapstick just in case you doubted the gravity of the situation!  But I'm not sure that it's a good idea to depict this mishap in the midst of a parade of racial stereotypes that is so politically correct that it's incorrect! Darryls cum covered body is still the erotic centrepiece of the picture. His powerful ass jet must be unique in erotic art. Is this cum or piss?

 11 
I freely admit that orgies are not my thing, unsatisfying whether as fantasy or reality. In this situation it's hard for a graphic artist to outdo modern photography, but Keith's inset panel showing a double penetration probably is pretty good, exploiting the artist's freedom to defy the laws of physics. The task of visually disentangling bodies in this scrummage is not easy and there are some strange things going on in the vicinity of Darryl's ass which I couldn't work out, nor the cock emerging from his thigh area. I do like the lines of Choi's body (left foreground) showing clean, sensuous curves.

 12

Another 'dual' picture, which is a neat way of summarising an orgy. Rocky and Jones have paired off and left Darryl to the new arrivals. We discover Choi has a nice line in sleazy dialogue (and him such a young lad too!) but as for Luna's contibution - suck my dick - oh dear! Once again here, it's the figure of Darryl that seems to have had the lion's share of the artists attention.

 13

 The foreground trio make a decent rough sex image, with an enjoyable conjunction of orgasms. I like the idea that Luna produces so much forceful cum that it sprays back out - that's funny and sexy. Rocky and Jones at the back have been drawn in antique, Kama Sutra style - explanatory rather than realistic so they don't seem to fit. You may not spot it at first but Choi on the left is holding Rocky's foot - presumably to lick it, continuing the foot fetish ingredient that recurs throughout this series.

 14

The boys produce a glorious mess which Darryl wallows in. You can form your own opinions about the nature of the fluids flying around in this picture. The sprays seem to have the gloopy appearance of cum but there are large pools of yellow liquid on the floor (which I have gently highlighted, since the outlines were very indistinct). The original scanning process seems to have cropped important detail top left - as well as the artist's signature.

15

It turns out the whole thing was a set-up. Darryl is reunited with his swimwear - a nice detail. This ending is a bit disappointing for fetishists like me, but it's geared for publication in a magazine for general consumption of course, so we can't grumble about that, I suppose. The dialogue is a bit naff, the cop talks like a hairdresser who's just finished a pensioner's weekly perm!

My restoration effort on this picture revealed the yellow shorts in the officer's hand, it looked (to me at any rate) like a towel or rag before. The cop appears to be putting his wallet back into his pocket as though he has just paid Darryl - or perhaps it's just his pager.

*****

The images that I was originally missing from this series turned out to be less exciting than I had hoped but I am very glad to have found out more about the talented 'Keith'.  My 'restoration' exercise was fun for me and revealed elements in the pictures which I had previously missed. I hope it has made the work more accessible for others as well and that Keith will forgive me for messing around with his work, at least I have restored his name to the pictures.

Keith's work is hard to find on the web, he has two blogs 'KeithKatsIV' at tumblr and blogspot , they contain some examples of his work, but you need to search. There are recent postings about him with pix at GMBA2 as well (link in sidebar).

Sunday, 25 November 2012

Arrest No 3 - Parole Violation (Parole Me)

The underwear campaign I utilised in my last post was entitled 'Parole' and it leads me neatly into this offering from 'Parole Him'. It features hunky Dominic Sol who has recently completed a prison sentence for drink driving. He has an appointment with Parole Officer Black.


Dominic has been breaching his bail conditions. 
He arrives for his interview expecting a hard ride


Officer Black doesn't mince his words, Dominic's going back to jail
 and in preparation for re-arrest Black searches him....


The search is very thorough. 
Black realises Dominic has more to offer
than the immature boys he usually has to deal with.
 

Dominic's heart sinks as the cuffs go on. Click. Click
It seems Black really does intend to send him back to jail.


 With his prisoner nicely immobilised and compliant,
Officer Black offers to explore some alternatives to Jail.
He begins by diving inside Dominic's jeans
and pulling out a whopper.


Once he's got over his surprise,
Dominic's thinks maybe this is gonna work out OK after all.


But he soon discovers it's not quite that simple
to butter up this Parole Offocer 


Black claims his penetrating, pants down forfeit
It's not a lot different to being in jail, Dominic reflects, 
but at least he should get to go home afterwards


You can tell that for all his harsh talk of jail
Officer Black has a soft spot for Dominic, really. 
Now he explores Dominic's soft spot - all for him.

 

While he works Dominic has plenty of time to contemplate
how to handle his next appointment with Officer Black.
But when another Officer appears and stops to watch them
he starts to get a sinking feeling that there's a catch in all this. 

If you're wondering where the underwear in my title comes in, visit ParoleHim and watch the video, the sequence where Black gets inside Dominic's jeans is very sexy, but if you blink you'll miss the undershorts!.

Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Arrest No 2 - The Dirty Underwear Gang

My last post of the old C-IN2 underwear images showing two men being forcefully arrested and handcuffed were not just a re-run of some old classics but a lead-in to the same company's more recent campaign which revisits the same idea, this time in the capable hands of photographer Rick Day. The results are more atmospheric than the originals, less sensual perhaps but arguably more raunchy. I've collected these images from the campaign and assembled a storyline loosely based on the campaign video. My story, is entirely fictional and the characters are not intended to bear any resemblance to the models who play them


Meet our 3 bad boys, left to right it's Michael, Gordon and Luis. They all belong to the Dirty Underwear Gang and this is their dress code. Gordon is the leader, the brains of the gang, Michael is the cocky show-off, he's into bling, Luis is the eternal worrier. Between them represent a range of attractive male stereotypes and the local cops find them pretty interesting. Particularly when they catch them in their dirty gang-underwear.
  

The boys are all on parole and it's a condition that they all live together in a caravan. Gordon insists that they always wear their dirty underwear together inside the caravan to show their brotherhood. Michael and Luis are not so sure it's such a good idea. Being separated from their wives and girlfriends and with all that grungy maleness in close proximity.
It gets quite hot in the caravan sometimes.


Luis spends a lot of time working under the bonnet of his car.
Gordon makes him change into more suitable clothes for this dirty work.
He doesn't want unexpected visitors to catch them in their gang-underwear.


Luis is reluctant to show anyone what's he's up to under the bonnet,
he's actually quite shy under all those tattoos .


Michael and Gordon step in if anyone gets too interested.
(Not wearing their gang-underwear of course)
They don't like strangers around.


When they're not working on the car, 
the boys like to relax in the caravan watching a horny film.
...but one day...

"Damn it!. Why does the phone always ring just when I'm getting there?"
says Gordon. "You get it Michael, will you?"

"I bet it's your flippin' sister again Gordon, I'll get rid of her. 
Then we can get back to the video"

"Sorry guys, I'm already leaking..." whines Luis,
"that last scene was so hot.....oh...oh .... I can't stop!"

"Oh, Luis, you're hopeless!"

 

Michael discovers it isn't Gordon's sister ringing.....
"What? Are you sure? The Cops? A raid?"



"Oh oh, Michael, I think they may be here already" interrupts Luis,
who has been cleaning himself up by the window.

"Christ, I'd better switch this porn off then, oh fuck, where's the remote gone?" 

 

 "Luis you are a silly boy, it's just the man delivering gas cylinders"

"Oh yeah, so it is! Sorry 'bout that, Michael"
 
 
"I'm gonna have to change these pants now, Michael, they're all wet.
Is there some more dirty underwear in the drawer?"

"I don't know Luis, go and look. I got problems of my own. God it's hot in here!"
.

"and I'm so horny!"


"Michael? The gas man says we gotta pay $100 off the bill, or he's gonna stop delivering,
but I'm skint after laying out on all them new C-IN2 undies for us,
I've given him a suck of my cock, but he says it's gotta be yours too. Sorry, Michael"
.
"That's OK Gordon, actually it's quite convenient right now......."

 

"Bloody hell, Luis, I think Michael must be paying off the whole arrears for us!"

"Yeah, I love Michael, he's so adorable"


Michael returns 20 minutes later and explains.


"....so when he told me he was a big fan of cowboy films
I knew exactly how to make him happy, look Gordon I'll show you.... "

"Yeah, whatever Michael. Well done anyway, we owe you one (yawn),
but right now I'm going to have a kip."

But scarcely has he closed his eyes when Luis calls out.


"Michael! come  to the window!
 Look! I'm sure it really is the police this time".


"Luis is right this time, Gordon, I can see a flashing light coming."

Luis is in a sweat, "What we gonna do, Gordon, I'm scared!"


Gordon gets a grip on the situation. 
"Look, there's no need to panic boys. Here's the plan.
First get those dirty pants off............"


"Sounds Cool!" says Luis.

"You sure we've got time for that?" says Michael.


When the cops finally arrive.......


....the boys are well ready for them,
they're pottering on the car, dressed in their Sunday best undies.

  Michael goes to talk to the cops,
he has put his bling jewellery away to avoid  awkward questions about it.

"We're all clean officer" he claims cockily.

"I can see that" says the cop admiring his protruding ensemble, "Too clean if anything".
"In fact, your underwear exactly matches the description of some stolen goods we're looking for."


 "Yeah, maroon seams with a budgie pouch in the middle.
Of course we'll need to take a closer look to be absolutely sure...."


".......so, I'm taking you in for detailed examination.
You're under arrest" .


Michael kicks off. "You accusing me of nicking stuff?"

"You can resist all you like, I don't mind" says the cop.
.
"You cops are all the same, bastards!" spits Michael.


"Quiet boy! You're only making it worse for yourself!"

"Sorry ma'am. I didn't mean to swear in front of a woman.
Can't you let me off this time?"


"Control to base, we're picking up the boys now.
Yeah, the idiots were actually wearing the stolen gear.
Get that special underwear interrogation cell ready for them."

"Gulp, please not that! Not the special underwear interrogation cell!"

"Click.....Click" go the cuffs.


The cops move on to Gordon.

"I see you've changed your pants from the ones you were wearing under the car" he laughs.
"Nice try but you're coming in too, to keep your buddy company."

"Please sir, I haven't done anything!" 

"Click.....Click" go the cuffs.


Meanwhile, Luis has been hiding in the caravan, stressed out.
He lies down dreaming about what to have done for his next tattoo.



Of course, the cops search the caravan and find him.
They take one look at his underwear and immediately decide he's got to be taken in too.
Even if he's not a receiver, he'll make an excellent exhibit.
Luis senses their interest.
"They're just hand-me-downs!" he protests.

"We can do any necessary hands down there back at the station, buddy" replies the officer sternly. 

"Click.......Click"go the cuffs

~The End~


With apologies to C-IN2 and the models who play my fictional characters so beautifully.

Michael - Anthony Gallo, 
Gordon - Chris Whelan,
Luis - Diogo Castro Gomes.

You can see the official video at Parole by C-IN2