Tom's not expecting his 'present' to be this year's must-have gadget
But hopes it might replace his incinerated clothing
So he can get back home and check everything's OK
It's actually a strange contraption of intimate purpose
which Tom dimly grasps, experiencing a surge of adrenaline
from forebodings and a certain curious excitement.
It's not something he would ever have asked Santa for
This selfish thought reminds him that his own child and wife
are going without upon this Christmas Day.
|Mitchell HG29 - Five Gold Rings|
Tom is a shy and modest man, but senses he can't decline
the urgings of the Security Men to try the 'thingy' on,
nor can he reject their obliging offers to help him.
It's a tight fit that gets tighter still as each section clips into place
but by some strange good fortune, the ointment used to salve his ass
proves to be invaluable for fitting the parts onto - and into him.
Tom's anatomy adapts impressively to the challenge
drawing forth admiring comparisons with Cinderella's slipper
but did that produce comparable levels of excitement?
As they work the Security men sing a jolly tune....
♫♪ ♪ ♫ On the first day of Christmas,
My Homeguard gave to me
five go-old rings! ♫♪ ♪ ♫
(pause for chuckles)
♫♪ ♪ ♫ four spanking hands! ♪ ♫ ♫♪ ♫
(that's very good, erm...)
♪ ♫ ♫♪ ♫ three french men......?
.......two burning buns
....and a butt-plug for my fannee ♪ ♫ ♫♪ ♫
(Readers contributions to this ditty welcomed!)
Read this series from Part 1