Meet our 3 bad boys, left to right it's Michael, Gordon and Luis. They all belong to the Dirty Underwear Gang and this is their dress code. Gordon is the leader, the brains of the gang, Michael is the cocky show-off, he's into bling, Luis is the eternal worrier. Between them represent a range of attractive male stereotypes and the local cops find them pretty interesting. Particularly when they catch them in their dirty gang-underwear.
The boys are all on parole and it's a condition that they all live together in a caravan. Gordon insists that they always wear their dirty underwear together inside the caravan to show their brotherhood. Michael and Luis are not so sure it's such a good idea. Being separated from their wives and girlfriends and with all that grungy maleness in close proximity.
It gets quite hot in the caravan sometimes.
Luis spends a lot of time working under the bonnet of his car.
Luis is reluctant to show anyone what's he's up to under the bonnet,
he's actually quite shy under all those tattoos .
Michael and Gordon step in if anyone gets too interested.
(Not wearing their gang-underwear of course)
They don't like strangers around.
Michael discovers it isn't Gordon's sister ringing.....
"What? Are you sure? The Cops? A raid?"
"Oh oh, Michael, I think they may be here already" interrupts Luis,
who has been cleaning himself up by the window.
"Luis you are a silly boy, it's just the man delivering gas cylinders"
Is there some more dirty underwear in the drawer?"
"and I'm so horny!"
"Michael? The gas man says we gotta pay $100 off the bill, or he's gonna stop delivering,
but I'm skint after laying out on all them new C-IN2 undies for us,
I've given him a suck of my cock, but he says it's gotta be yours too. Sorry, Michael"
"Bloody hell, Luis, I think Michael must be paying off the whole arrears for us!"
Michael returns 20 minutes later and explains.
"....so when he told me he was a big fan of cowboy films
I knew exactly how to make him happy, look Gordon I'll show you.... "
but right now I'm going to have a kip."
"Michael! come to the window!
Look! I'm sure it really is the police this time".
"Luis is right this time, Gordon, I can see a flashing light coming."
Gordon gets a grip on the situation.
First get those dirty pants off............"
"Sounds Cool!" says Luis.
When the cops finally arrive.......
....the boys are well ready for them,
they're pottering on the car, dressed in their Sunday best undies.
Michael goes to talk to the cops,
he has put his bling jewellery away to avoid awkward questions about it.
"In fact, your underwear exactly matches the description of some stolen goods we're looking for."
"Yeah, maroon seams with a budgie pouch in the middle.
Of course we'll need to take a closer look to be absolutely sure...."
".......so, I'm taking you in for detailed examination.
You're under arrest" .
Michael kicks off. "You accusing me of nicking stuff?"
"Quiet boy! You're only making it worse for yourself!"
Can't you let me off this time?"
"Control to base, we're picking up the boys now.
Yeah, the idiots were actually wearing the stolen gear.
Get that special underwear interrogation cell ready for them."
The cops move on to Gordon.
"I see you've changed your pants from the ones you were wearing under the car" he laughs.
"Nice try but you're coming in too, to keep your buddy company."
He lies down dreaming about what to have done for his next tattoo.
They take one look at his underwear and immediately decide he's got to be taken in too.
Even if he's not a receiver, he'll make an excellent exhibit.
Michael - Anthony Gallo,
Gordon - Chris Whelan,
Luis - Diogo Castro Gomes.